If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
