I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
