I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
