Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
