How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
