also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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