hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize