perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
