i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
