her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
