He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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