I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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