I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
