I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
