what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
