Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
