they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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