Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
