love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
