everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
3pm strippers are depressing
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
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