you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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