so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
