Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
