how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
