Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
