I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
