no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
