'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
