If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
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