just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
