Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
