You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Holy shit dude........stairs
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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