the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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