When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
