I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Your dad touched me again.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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