The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
