I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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