Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
