areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
