we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
