so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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