quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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