Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
