WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
