4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Its about making memories worth repressing
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Randomize
