I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I'm eating all of the evidence.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
