drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
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