he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
what is it with giant penises always finding me
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Randomize
