all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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