Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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